Are You Being Refined by the Almighty Refiner?? February 24, 2009

Sorry to all my readers…it’s been a while since I last posted!  Have you ever felt overwhelmed, but couldn’t figure out why? We all have been there and I am there at this point in my life and have been the past several weeks.  Is God trying to teach me something?  Is God trying to transform me?  Is God trying to mold me for the work He is about to have me do?  Is God wanting to use me, but can’t use me as I am now?  Am I just putting my hands in every spot that needs help in the church?  What are the answers?

I have been having tough issues of where I should be serving in the church.  What about your issues of serving?  Do you know where God wants you?  I know that my passion is for teens and have worked with teens the past 6 years of my life, is that where God wants me?

Since starting Crosspoint I have been greeting which I love very much because I am a people person, I have been working in Fusion K-5th grade and working in with the beautiful babies, my husband and I open our home to Lifegroup on Wednesday nights which is AWESOME in itself!  Has God put me in these places of ministry because He wants me there or have I taken them on because I think I should be apart of everything in the church!

My thoughts at this point has been that God needed me to experience these other ministries to know where my true ministry is.  It didn’t mean that he wanted me to stay in some of these ministries.  During the past 8 months God has been refining me for a ministry that I am very passionate about, I feel I just wasn’t ready for that ministry when we came to Crosspoint!  God did not want me there YET…He had some refining to do on me.  Not just small stuff…he was having to skim some very ugly junk from the Hot Pot of Silver!  From the time we came to Crosspoint…I was hoping to be able to work with the Youth….NOT!  God needed to do some work on me and He was bringing others to Crosspoint that had talents and qualities to form a team?  Thank God, He doesn’t let me be in charge!  It’s His timing not ours.  Ever been there? Uh…yep!

What is God’s refinement procees?

Psalm 66:10-12 (The Message)  Used “The Message” liked it’s interpretation.

^8-12 Bless our God, O peoples!
Give him a thunderous welcome!
Didn’t he set us on the road to life?
Didn’t he keep us out of the ditch?
He trained us first,
passed us like silver through refining fires,
Brought us into hardscrabble country,
pushed us to our very limit,
Road-tested us inside and out,
took us to hell and back;
Finally he brought us
to this well-watered place.

God’s refining porocess:  First God tries us (tests, proves or examines) us. This is not the most exciting place to be when this happens in our lives.  Sometimes I feel as if God is testing me constantly, but you know I figured out that if I am constantly being tested then I need to take a step back and look at how I am responding to His test.  Am I responding  in an obedient or disobedient way to what He is putting into my life to refine me.  If I respond obediently then I have made it through that set of trials.  See it is an ongoing process because we are not what God wants us to be and will not be until we meet Him in the air.  But He is getting us ready, and at the same time you could say, He is getting us ready for the next work he has for us in this world or ministry!

He refines (makes pure or purge) out our weaknesses, our weak hearts and unfaithfulness. He is setting the fire a little hotter because through his fire our Refiner will perfect an awesome work in us.  He will take what is impure and make it pure.  He will take what is dull and make it beautiful.  He will transform us into His treasure. I can look back from when we joined Crosspoint and see where God has been transforming me through the Silver Refinement Process…yes it hurts!  Now I see where I should be ministering in our church.  (By the way…I will not tell you the Ministry that God is giving to Paul,  I and several other Crosspoint team members at this point…it is a work in progress is what I can tell you.  It’s going to be an AWESOME ministry! Woot! I’m so excited!  Sorry lost my thoughts for a moment! Ha! Here we go!

There are so many fiery flames in many of our lives.  There are disappointing situations, from minor things that irritate us to major tragedies, this is where He will make a difference.  Different flames, different fires (trials) will come and go.  In the pressure of their heat is where we we’ll see the impurities of our lives being released and rising to the top.  Then the Lord will start to skim them off, purifying us, refining us into His image.  He sometimes will have to make the fire a little hotter to cause new impurities to rise to the top.  To be exposed for what they are.  Then these too, He will skim away.  (And man have I had some impurities exposed in the last 8 months and still having them exposed)  At first He may see only a dim image of Himself as He looks into our life.  But as time goes on His image becomes clearer, more glowing, more beautiful.  We have to remember that all these trials and tribulations that we are going through for Him is to refine us and to prepare us for our ministries ahead!

Remember, (which is hard to do…because I’m a failure at it) during all these trials and tribulations that we are going through for Him is to refine us.  He never leaves us or forsakes His treasure which is us.  As long as the fire is burning He never leaves that crucible, never steps away from the fire.  He is always there to make sure every flame that reaches us is exactly the right temperature- not too hot! – to accomplish its work in our lives.  He knows the precise temperature to maintain so we don’t face more than we can bear.  He test and proves our faith, not to discredit us, but to show us how far we’ve come.  He perfects our perseverance.

The fire has been HOT under me lately…He is purging!  Getting me ready for the next level of helping in a new ministry! I’m fired up, I love Jesus, I love my Pastor and his wife, they both have ministered to me!  God put me under Pastor Dave’s preaching for a reason.  God put me at Crosspoint for a reason!  I know that reason now!  Not only have I met knew friends, but have been able to minister to some of those friends and they have ministered to me.  God has released something within me to be able to go out and invite people to come to Crosspoint and explain to them what it’s all about!  Never would I have dreamed I would get to play a major role in God’s world like He is allowing me to do!  I give Him all the praise and glory for it all!

I will leave you with this question.  Who are you in the Refiner’s picture?  Can He begin to see His image?  Who am I in the Refiner’s picture?  I’m still dim in His image…but he is skimming the impurities right off the top and I’m sure my fire will get a little hotter and little hotter until I’m obedient for that next step I take in becoming more like His image!

What is Happening to Me… February 2, 2009

Twittering, Facebook, MySpace, blogging, what’s next?  Seven months ago I didn’t use any of these technologies to keep up with my friends or even know about twitter and I wasn’t going to do the Facebook, MySpace thing.  I thought I was the “cool mom” just knowing how to text.  Of course, I stunk at it….because I had the number pad phone at the time.  I remember the first time I tried sending a text. lol My oldest son was a freak about Harry Potter Books, we had to do all the before midnight stuff at Books-A-Million every time a new book game out!  About 3 years ago, I decided to take Blake and his cousin and drop them off at Books-A-Million for all the festivities and would be back at midnight to pick them up.

At midnight I returned to Books-A-Million and was waiting in the parking lot, so I tried calling…no answer!  I began to start trying to text…finally after 15 minutes of trying to figure it out, I had typed out “are u n line“, my son text me back and says “yes mom we r up close to the register,” (he answers me within 2 seconds after I sent my text to him).   I text back “ok great” (taking about another 10 minutes).  Blake text back and says, “what took u so long to respond lol?”  I text back and said, “what is lol?” So you get the jest of how it was going with me learning to text!

I began texting more and  more…I couldn’t type without counting out the number of times I had to hit the number pad to make an “n” or “r”, I needed an easier solution…I needed a Verizon Black Berry.   I needed this Verizon Black Berry, so I could easily text my kids while at school if I wanted them to know something or they needed to tell me something…I needed and wanted to stay in touch with my kids.  Yep, I was breaking school rules!  So, I go and get this cool Black Berry and can’t work anything else on it!  But, I can type out some freakin text in no time!  I was pumped!

Oh, where was I, yes so in less than 6 months I have learned to twitter, set up a MySpace, Facebook page and also a blog.  My blog is quite the amateur blog…not at all close to a state of the art blog like Pastor Daves, and never will be, but they’re my feelings written down.  I never dreamed of ever using any of these technologies until our family started attending Crosspoint Community Church.  This church is so technology based it was awsomely crazy and…I wanted to stay connected with Crosspoints vision.  For me to do that was to be able to be apart of this Church in everyway possible.  Techno savvy here I come!  I set up the MySpace page worked it a little, then came the Facebook page and blog!

I have met (not face to face) but see their picture of people from all over the U.S. by twittering what I’m doing, using Facebook to send messages and MySpace to communicate to my friends.  I have seen what other pastors churches are doing to win the lost to Christ…I just stand in awe of what all is taking place in the world to win lost people to Christ.

What we can do through this type of technology, we can pray for each other at that very moment, get Bible verses from each other, know when someone is hurting and needs the prayer right then…hear words of encouragement, and laugh.  I see their picture and when they respond to me I feel as if I can actually here there voice and imagine what they sound like.  People are using this technology to find better ways their church can do more to win the unsaved to Christ.  Through these 3 types of technology I’m using…the words of others and hopefully my words are touching others lives!  How amazing that is to me!

I can honestly say, I didn’t know there really was a world outside of my “traditional church” setting!  I am not at all knocking the traditional church, there are thousands of traditional churches that God is using to draw the unsaved to Him.  But, I believe God was wanting me out of my box.  When it came to what or how others were winning souls to Christ I was oblivious to the fact that it was really happening.  I was use to the christian people just switching churches when they would get mad.  Or having the children of the church come to believe.

I’m seeing the vision Crosspoint is developing and prayers being answered by God!  God bringing servants with awesome talents to Crosspoint.…I believe He is building His team.  There is an extreme presence of God in the service, you can just feel God moving in this place.  God is going to use Crosspoint to reach lost people all over North Alabama.  I feel blessed that God is wanting to use me in Crosspoints journey and vision to win the unsaved to Christ!

God Bless and start twittering!

Accepting The Challenge… January 5, 2009

Yesterday our church started a new series “ReThink”, we were challenged to ReThink Church in a way in which us/our church can reach the world.  We were ask by our Pastor, “Do you think God can fill this theater 3 times”, we all screamed yes…”then why do you think he can’t do more?”

Isaiah 55:8 8 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
       neither are your ways my ways,”
       declares the LORD.

 9 “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
       so are my ways higher than your ways
       and my thoughts than your thoughts.

Pastor Dave used the illustration of the “Good Samaritan” to help us understand how we should and can reach the lost in our own daily walk. Read Luke 10:27-37:

27He answered: ” ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’^[a]; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’^[b]”

 28“You have answered correctly,” Jesus replied. “Do this and you will live.”

 29But he wanted to justify himself, so he asked Jesus, “And who is my neighbor?”

 30In reply Jesus said: “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he fell into the hands of robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead. 31A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. 32So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. 33But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. 34He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, took him to an inn and took care of him. 35The next day he took out two silver coins^[c] and gave them to the innkeeper. ‘Look after him,’ he said, ‘and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.’

 36“Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?”

 37The expert in the law replied, “The one who had mercy on him.”
      Jesus told him, “Go and do likewise.”

In other words there are people on a daily basis that we come in contact with, face to face in our community and through technology everyday.  We have an opportunity to share through the Internet such as Facebook, MySpace, Twitter and Internet Church (which Crosspoint is hosting on Sunday mornings live at http://www.mogulus.com/moviechurch). 

God ask us to love our neighbor!  He didn’t ask us to pass on the other side of the road…go down another isle in the market…turn away when meeting someone in a hallway, etc…He gives us a way even through technology, meeting new friends through Internet connections, which in turn gives us the opportunity to get to know more about these friends lives.  We find out about what is going on in there life…people are hurting.  God has given us an easy opprotunity to minister to a hurting, beaten up, hopeless, left to be forgotten people in this world.  But, do I take God up on His offer?  No, I am guilty!  I don’t embrace this person and tell them about Jesus!  Why do I let fear keep me from this?  Do you feel this way? 

    Deuteronomy 31:8

8 The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”

 Luke 14:23

“Then the master told his servant, ‘Go out to the roads and country lanes and make them come in, so that my house will be full.

“Accepting the Challenge” to win lost people to Christ amounts to going out to the roads and country lanes of our cities, state, world and make them come!  As Pastor Dave uses the words “make them”…his translation is to “drag them” in!

The Bible says in Matthew 28:19-20

19Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in^[a] the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

To “Accept the Challenge” I must put this fear that I have aside and take the challenge that has been set before me by Pastor Dave. I pray and I ask that you pray for me that I would take the step  in faith in this scripture:

Deuteronomy 31:8

8 The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”

Ephesians 3:20

20 Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work WITHIN US, to accomplish INFINITELY more than we might ask or think.

Maybe you haven’t made this decision in your life to do that!  Leave a comment below if God is leading you in the “Accepting The Challenge” direction in your life.  That way I can pray for you too!

God Bless!

Bring on the New Year 2009 December 31, 2008

I am so ready for the New Year 2009, God has something special en-store for my family…I know it!  God is Blessing!  Last year beginning January 11, 2008 we stepped into a storm that actually blew our entire family away…it was so unexpected.  It not only affected my family, but, my extended family as well.   

Have you ever felt like your life has just been ripped right out from under you and there is no where to turn…church gone…friends gone, even friends that you actually thought were your best of  friends, just vanish.  This is what happened to our family…all our friends were in the church.  Cuz you sure don’t want to hangout with non-Christians…now isn’t that right??????  Talk about this more on into my blog!

We left our church toward the end of January, God leading us to worship in our home.  I did have 2 friends and my entire family and Pauls family that stuck to us like clue during this storm.  Although, our BIGGEST and BESTEST friend was JESUS.  Even though I so love those 2 friends and our family, He was the One we needed the most!

We began worship in our home as soon as we stopped attending our other church.  We got up every Sunday morning took our showers as if attending church as we normally would have.  My hubby put all the music together every week and we jammed for 30 minutes to our favorite worship songs.  Man how AWESOME this was, Jesus was rockin in our house with us.  We played the music as loud as we wanted, clapped, raised our hands and partied with the JESUS!  Amen!  After our worship time we watched a video relating to teen issues then following this we did a Kay Arthur 40 minute study lead by my hubby!  Zachary did song worship with us, then he would go and watch a Bible based video in his room.  On Wednesday nights Paul met with our teen boys and did Bible Studies with them while Liana and I did a Bible Study together maybe this could have been call our small group time.

Our family was growing closer and closer together.  Paul and the boys became close and Liana and I became mother/daughter friends.  God had us right where he wanted us in this season of our life.  Even though it was hard we tried our best to keep our eyes on God and be obedient in everything He wanted us to do.

We never missed a Sunday or Wednesday night for 6 months in our home.  God began moving in mine and Paul’s hearts…leading us both in the direction to begin searching for a church.  We begin to visit churches and praying that God would show us the right church.  We visited 2 churches and neither one of us nor the kids felt like God was leading us to either one.

I was searching online for churches in our area and came across Crosspoint Community Church which met in the movie theater behind the Mall in Decatur, AL.  I ask Paul to view their website and see what he thought about it.   I felt like from reading and listening to Pastor Dave sermons online…that this might be a place we could check out and the kids would like.

We had our first visit in June…(during this time Blake our oldest was in Basic Training at Fort Benning) we all thought it was awesome the first Sunday we were there.  We went back again the next Sunday, and the next…we were being drawn to this church.  I began to write Blake about the church while he was at Fort Benning…he was getting excited about it just through my letters.

Let me go back…the first time we visited Crosspoint, what stood out in my mind from the whole sermon was a comment that Pastor Dave made,  ”Crosspoint is a church that wants people that no other churches want,” man that got me fired up!  Pastor Daves sermon was awesome and the worship leader and band were worshiping exactly like we had been doing at home for the past 6 months.  Think that might have been God leading us?

Well guess what, we are still there and have not visited any other churches.  We are involved as volunteers for a portable church…which is the most awesome church I have ever been in or a part of.  Crosspoint is not there for the Christians, but for the lost.  Just as Jesus didn’t come for the religious but for the lost.  Mark 2:17  17 When Jesus heard this, he told them, “Healthy people don’t need a doctor—sick people do. I have come to call not those who think they are righteous, but those who know they are sinners.”  I’m not saying they don’t love the Christian body…but they need the christian body that comes there to get up off their butts and do Gods work.  Crosspoint wants to harvest the fields that are white to harvest of Morgan County, the City of Decatur and all surrounding cities and counties.  Crosspoint, the staff and volunteers are busy about this work and put their hearts into it.  Yes, it is hard work for them and many are up and at the theater setting up by 5:00 a.m. on Sunday morning then taking down after the service in time for the theatre to open. 

God is Blessing!  Crosspoint is doing 2 services now.  Paul and I have seen it double since we began attending.

Pastor Dave works a full-time job, his job has him traveling, but he never stops ministering to people!  He feeds and ministers to his sheep!  And is fired up about winning the lost to Christ and that is his Vision and his Vision for Crosspoint. 

As I look back on our trial of 2008, I see Jesus carrying my family because there is only one set of footprints.  I see him carrying us right into the doors of Crosspoint and giving us the opportunity to serve Him and be a part of a Vision I have never seen before.  Thank you God for leading and guiding us in this time of trial. 

Another thing I see as I look back over the years and that I have learned from our storm of 2008. is that I pretty much only had christian friends.  Since being at Crosspoint I have learned and have been challenged through the scripture and God speaking through Dave that it’s ok to hangout with or have lost friends.  That’s who Jesus wants! 

It’s ok for someone to come into Crosspointchurch with their houseshoes on.  It’s ok for someone to wear blue jeans on Sunday morning, it’s ok if someone comes into the service with 8 holes in each ear, it’s ok if someone comes in with tatoo’s on their body, it’s ok if a drunk comes in reaking of alcohol, it’s ok if a homosexual comes in, it’s ok if someone with marital problems or drug users come into our church (Crosspoint) on Sunday morning because that is who Crosspoint wants. 

How am I/you suppose to witness to somebody that doesn’t know me…are they going to listen?  Yes, I can be a witness by shuving the scripture down someones throat and MAYBE some would take me up on the offer and accept Christ as their Savior, then what…will they know what to do.  But, if I/you spend your time getting to know that lost person, showing that lost person how much I/you care, devoting our time, our prayers, helping that person out in ways that no one else could do…just maybe this person is going to get to know me/you and through me/you will come to know Christ.  What an investment of our time!  AWESOME!

So this is my taking on beginning the New Year 2009.  I am only going to make one New Years Resolution.   This is…to be OBEDIENT TO GOD IN… INVESTING MY TIME in getting to know HIM more… INVESTING MY TIME into getting to know lost people and WINNING them to CHRIST!  I need your prayers…I’m human, I guarantee you I will mess this up, but keep me lifted in your prayers that I will run the race that is set before me.

Hebrews 12:1-3  1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. 2 We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith.^[a] Because of the joy^[b] awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne. 3 Think of all the hostility he endured from sinful people;^[c] then you won’t become weary and give up.

God Bless and Have a Happy and Blessed New Years 2009!

Do You Love Me? December 27, 2008

It seems as if we go through life wondering if our husbands, our children, family members and friends love us.  Sometimes we feel insecure about the other people in our life, and are not sure where we stand.  Even though we try to tell and show everyone we love them, they don’t seem to catch the answer…do people test our love for them? 

Do your children sometimes wear crazy clothes, put rings in their ears, color their hair in strange colors, and use bad language to see if you really love them?  I have to admit, I sometimes get upset at what my oldest son wears…haven’t had to worry about rings all over the body yet, strange colored hair or bad language (that I know of) lol.  Our whole culture is continually testing us to see if we really love them…don’t you think!

Before going to Crosspoint Community Church  I would look at others and say why in the world would they want to do that…is it for attention?  The recent series of “INKED” put all this in perspective for me…actually just attending Crosspoint changed my whole perspective on loving others as they are.  Why do we judge the outside?  It is not what is on the outside…but the inside!  Do they have Jesus, do they LOVE Jesus is what counts.  Have I done my part to share the love of Jesus to get others to love Him?

How about Peter and his love for Jesus. Check out this scripture John 21:15-22. 

15After breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of John, do you love me more than these?”

   ”Yes, Master, you know I love you.”

   Jesus said, “Feed my lambs.”

 16He then asked a second time, “Simon, son of John, do you love me?”

   ”Yes, Master, you know I love you.”

   Jesus said, “Shepherd my sheep.”

 17-19Then he said it a third time: “Simon, son of John, do you love me?”

   Peter was upset that he asked for the third time, “Do you love me?” so he answered, “Master, you know everything there is to know. You’ve got to know that I love you.”

   Jesus said, “Feed my sheep. I’m telling you the very truth now: When you were young you dressed yourself and went wherever you wished, but when you get old you’ll have to stretch out your hands while someone else dresses you and takes you where you don’t want to go.” He said this to hint at the kind of death by which Peter would glorify God. And then he commanded, “Follow me.”

 20-21Turning his head, Peter noticed the disciple Jesus loved following right behind. When Peter noticed him, he asked Jesus, “Master, what’s going to happen to him?”

 22-23Jesus said, “If I want him to live until I come again, what’s that to you? You—follow me.” That is how the rumor got out among the brothers that this disciple wouldn’t die. But that is not what Jesus said. He simply said, “If I want him to live until I come again, what’s that to you?”

In this passage Jesus asks Peter three times (after His crucifixion and resurrection and Peter’s recent denial of Him) whether Peter really loves Him.

I believe that these basic questions…

• Do you love Me?  (verse 15)
• Do you love Me? (verse 16)
• Do you love Me? (verse 17)…

are in agreement with Peter’s three denials of Jesus (John 13:38)

  38“Really? You’ll lay down your life for me? The truth is that before the rooster crows, you’ll deny me three times.”

Jesus in His love for Peter wanted to give him a second chance to follow Him.  He didn’t want Peter to go all through life with the sin of denying Jesus before.  His crucifixion.  He wanted Peter to know that he was forgiven for his wrongdoings and that he could have a valuable ministry in spreading the gospel throughout the world.  Is this not what Jesus does for us?  Wow…thank God for 2nd chances!

But before Peter was able to confirm his love for Jesus, Jesus stated in verses 18 and 19 that the decision was going to cost him a price.  Some of you may remember Peter was crucified upside down about 40 years later.  After Jesus stated there would be a price for following Him Jesus said, “Follow ” and Peter did.

Isaiah 30:15   God, the Master, The Holy of Israel,
   has this solemn counsel:
“Your salvation requires you to turn back to me
   and stop your silly efforts to save yourselves.
Your strength will come from settling down
   in complete dependence on me-

Yes, love has its price, for us not always to the extreme of Peter’s, but a price of time, energy, commitment, money, and devotion. 

Is there someone in my/your life who is asking the very basic question “Do you love me?”  What is my/your reply? 

 

 

Can’t Get My Blog On…but I’ve Got My Mark On December 25, 2008

Sorry I haven’t blogged in a while…everything has been out of sorts for me this Christmas season!  I usually have all my gifts bought by Thanksgiving or right after!  I really screwed (sorry) messed that up this year!  I was shopping right up until Christmas Eve and still didn’t get stocking stuffers!  I know I am a terrible mom!  First year my kids has ever gone without stockings…they didn’t even get candy in the darn things.  It was if I was turning in circles.  My hubby did the shopping for our kids.  (All I had to do was buy for other family members and little odd and end stuff.)  On top of that my hubby wrapped all the presents. 

I don’t tell him enough how thankful I am for him, nor how much I love him.  God sent him to me for a reason…no one else can understand or would understand me.  I’m not saying my hubby does either but, he tolerates me!  He definitely has Galatians 5:22-23 in him.   22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23gentleness and self-control.  The funny part is, my hubby also thinks God gave me to him.  Isn’t that neat?  He saves me often from going off the deep end…sometimes I’m already in the deep murky stuff and he manages to pull me out, build my confidence, self-esteem and helps take away all those worries that I tend to have often…(yes, I know that is a sin).  When I talked about him being my hero…in my life story on this blog, on facebook and myspace…I mean’t it, he truly is.  When he took me as his wife, he mean’t every vow he said to me and he proves those to me daily.  I have never seen a man…not saying there is not one…but my hubby has always put his children before anything in this life besides Christ and myself.  Our family was built by him.  Even though our family has had life struggles and trials set before us, our faith in God and my hubby being the leader of our home  has helped us keep our eyes focused on Christ and not the situations we were in.  YES, it is definantly hard not to dwell on those difficult seasons in our life, but Jesus is our HOPE our Eternal HOPE.  This is the HOPE that we want others to know.  I can truly say there will never be another man in my life if my hubby goes to heaven before me.  I do have to admit that my hubby is…my hero #2.

My hero #1 is my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, for he died that I might be set free.

Romans 6:6-11   Could it be any clearer? Our old way of life was nailed to the cross with Christ, a decisive end to that sin-miserable life—no longer at sin’s every beck and call! What we believe is this: If we get included in Christ’s sin-conquering death, we also get included in his life-saving resurrection. We know that when Jesus was raised from the dead it was a signal of the end of death-as-the-end. Never again will death have the last word. When Jesus died, he took sin down with him, but alive he brings God down to us. From now on, think of it this way: Sin speaks a dead language that means nothing to you; God speaks your mother tongue, and you hang on every word. You are dead to sin and alive to God. That’s what Jesus did.

Now I know my blog started out pathetic, feeling sorry for myself.  But you know what?…my kids didn’t get as much this Christmas as they usually do and didn’t even whine about it…yes, everything was very hectic, but this has been a very happy and memorable Christmas for me and my family.  We have spent quality time with each other and have had church via internet at our home and celebrated Christ’s coming!  Now how can I leave this blog saying that I didn’t have a Wonderful Christmas! 

I really need to mention that I have many people who inspire me from my church, Crosspoint Community Church.  Our pastor, Dave Anderson , many friends on my twitter and facebook and the many friends on the right of my page that blog who keep me encouraged about church and the vision that our church has. 

Have you ever thought about being marked in Christ?  Our church just finished a series entitled ”INKED”, it definiately left a mark on our church and on me and my family.  Our pastor, did things in our church during this series that probably no other church in Alabama or anywhere close has ever done.  I’m quoting him, “We did it because it was THE VERY BEST WAY to communicate WHY Christ came to earth and show what our response should be.  When Christ came he left a permanent “mark” on this planet.  He left us here to continue that.”  Please follow this link to his blog and read “INKED” – IT MARKED US!  Also, read the INKED Stories that were told by some of my friends from Crosspoint.

I will leave you with CHRIST, MARKED, and to CONTINUE!

God Bless and Merry Christmas!

Christmas Blues….. December 9, 2008

Each year beginning before Thanksgiving, I begin to get hyped up about Christmas.  I think about decorating the outside and inside of my house, having it ready to reveal to the neighborhood on Thanksgiving night!  Every year it comes with great excitement.  This year it didn’t happen!  I mean give me a break I was only a couple of days off.

I truly love Christmas and the very meaning of it…Jesus.  But, every year I seem to get miserable around this time of year!  As I decorate I get more and more stressed as each ball goes on the tree, as each wreath goes on the window and as each strand of garland with lights and red bows are hung around my porch.  Grant it, I get it done.  I then feel like crap knowing it’s going to have to come down in a month! 

My Home for Christmas

Even seeing my home all lit up with spot lights, red bows, wreaths and lighted garland draped around my huge front porch, having 2 trees, one in the foyer, tall slim tree decorated in hot pinks, lime, purple and aqua blue. 

Foyer Tree

In the great room a Santa tree, of course decorated in Santa’s, all the kids stuff that was made at school, stuffed christmas animals and toys, big red and green balls and colored lights, a snow village with plenty of snow hanging from the mantle with stockings hanging from the fireplace insert, and my most favorite of all the manager scene, I still have the Christmas Blues.

Santa Tree

 

Snow Village

This year is even worse!  I have only bought 2 presents and I have 4 children.  Today is the 9th of December…I usually have my Christmas done by Thanksgiving or right after.  I tend to use online Christmas!  Can’t even do that this year, seeing that I have waited to late.  Does anyone have this problem?  Oh, I know I’m not the only one!

Stockings

Really…all I want for Christmas is to celebrate Jesus the Most High, Everlasting, Prince of Peace!

I would like to be relaxed and enjoy my family, some gift giving and some wonderful Christmas music with some eggnog!  That’s all I want for Christmas!

Manager Scene

Here is how I usually look at it, I feel like going into hibernation mode. I just want to curl up and sleep right thru the holidays.  I think I have seasonal affective disorder, ever what that is??  What’s even more difficult is trying to stay upbeat for my family and not bring them down, although I do tend to make them miserable while I’m putting all the decorations up.   They want to help and I’m rearranging everything they put up…not good!  As I am sitting here writing, the wind is blowing so hard, I hear decorations falling and hitting my porch!  Why is it everytime the decorations go up the wind begins to blow?   Happens every year!

While others, especially my children are counting the days until Christmas, I am counting the days until Christmas is over!  They should make a pill you can take to get rid of the Christmas blues!  I’m going to try my very best to get rid of my Christmas Blues starting now…relax and have a thankful Christmas.

Maybe I should start by saying what I’m thankful for:

1. Christ died for me that I may have eternal life with Him.
2. He changed my life when I accepted Him as my Savior.
3. God gave me a Christian Mom and Dad.
4. God gave me a very special husband that IS my hero, friend and the love of my life.
5. God gave me 4 beautiful and wonderful precious children.
6. God provided a way for me to stay home and raise my children.
7. God gave me a Pastor and Church Crosspoint Community Church that meets the needs of my family, I/we are blessed to be apart of the vision of Crosspoint…that is winning unsaved people to the Lord…Crosspoint is very serious about this vision.
8. God gave me my wonderful sisters.
9. God gave me my beautiful neices and nehews.
10. God gave me a special Mother and Father inlaw.
11. God gave me a beautiful home to live in.
12. I am thankful for the friends that have received me and my family at Crosspoint.

Well, I feel better, there is so many other things that I am thankful for and could have written, but this is a start and I will finish my list.  When God is in the picture their is no reason to feel so blue. we may be struggling with trials in our life and sometimes it’s not easy to face these trials, but who better to go through them with than our Lord Jesus Christ!  I pray that God will help me to focus on that which He has done for me and given me and take all the Christmas Blues out of my home.  How about yours?  Maybe you should make a list!

I will be praying for all you other Christmas Blues people.  I pray that each and everyone of you will, love Jesus, celebrate Jesus, love your family, relax, give your gifts and have a joyful time listening to some great Christmas music, drinking hot chocolate and eggnog!

Joy to the world, the LORD is coming!

Family Tradition…But What I’m Thankful For! November 29, 2008

I am so thankful for what God has brought me through.  If you have been following my post on “My Life” which is not complete, you can see where I have been in my life thus far.  I made wrong choices as a young teen, but God used my circumstances to mold me into what I am today.  He continues to mold me like the potter does his pottery or the silversmith refining his silver.  The fire may get hot, and by all means I’m not rejoicing…but, I look back and see how I have grown from the Potters or Refiner’s Hands!  He is not through with me yet!

I went through a time in my life where I had no food or very little (I didn’t go in detail about this in my post on “My Life”).  I am so grateful that I spent that time knowing what it feels like to have no food or very little, no washer to wash clothes or money to take them to the laundry mat, only a tub (bathtub for scrubbing them), no car to go places or a junk of a car with no money to put gas in.

God had a plan for me even after I had made those choices. God is using me now as a servant to others and I am so grateful for that.  I love helping people, it is my passion.

Our Life Group from Crosspoint Community Church  had the opportunity to help with a couple and their 2 granddaughters for Thanksgiving, she was such a blessing to our group!  This is things of which I am so thankful for.  Being blessed more by the ones you are helping, this is what I love.

I am thankful for Christ dying for me and the entire world that we may have eternal life with Him.  I am thankful for my mom who raised me in church so that when I strayed like the prodical son, I knew to come home.  I am thankful for my husband Paul, my friend, the love of my life and my hero.  Without him I would have not had values in my life.  He has taught me so much throughout our 19 almost 20 years of marriage about family, caring loving and respecting one another, I am so thankful that God put him in my life.

I am thankful for the church that I attend now (Crosspoint), it is a church that has a vision to reach the lost (the unsaved) and I feel blessed to be apart of that vision.  I love God, my Husband, my family, my church and am thankful that I have these in my life.  My God has blessed me more than I could ever deserve.

Psalms 100:3

3 Know that the LORD is God.
       It is he who made us, and we are his ;
       we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.

Psalm 95

 1 Come, let us sing for joy to the LORD;
       let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation.

 2 Let us come before him with thanksgiving
       and extol him with music and song.

 3 For the LORD is the great God,
       the great King above all gods.

 4 In his hand are the depths of the earth,
       and the mountain peaks belong to him.

 5 The sea is his, for he made it,
       and his hands formed the dry land.

 6 Come, let us bow down in worship,
       let us kneel before the LORD our Maker;

Psalm 107:1
“Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever.”

Growing Even Further Away From God and Church (My Life Part 3) November 17, 2008

Between the ages of 16-18 years I was partying heavily.  I began hanging at a house in Decatur that was known as “The Party House of Decatur!”  I made many friends at this house, why?, there was no judgement between anyone, you were accepted the way you were.  Come on in the more the merrier.

Still very introverted the drugs and drinking that I was doing helped me be a little more outgoing.  So by age 18, I was doing pot, pills (uppers, downers) some cocaine, drinking, and playing poker for money, I guess you can say the only thing I hadn’t done was had sex!

The police knew all about this house and it’s owner.  It was raided several times when I was there.  Did that scare me away from being apart of all this?? No! I look back and wonder why God didn’t take me out.  I can see how God had his hand on me and how he was guiding me even in my rebellious stage!

I eventually got up the courage to tell my mom that I wasn’t going to attend church anymore, that I had nothing in common with all those that were attending and most of them didn’t care about church either.  So I stopped going!!!

Then…I met a guy at the party house one night, he was 4 years older than me and very nice looking.  We began dating, if that is what you want to call it.  He began living at the party house, I was there night and day, so this was our date nights.  He never came to my home to meet my mother or father, I knew my parents wouldn’t approve, but I did talk to them about him, I made him sound good.

I was still a virgin at 18, then the inevitable happened.  We had been dating several months, he would tell me he loved me, he was going to marry me, so it would be ok.  I was so naive and wanting someone to care for me that I let it happen.  Soon after we started dating, a warrant for his arrest was issued to him (jail time for writing bad checks) I had no clue this was what he was doing!  He was in Morgan County Jail for about 3 months.  I attended the jail every Sunday to see him. I look back and I know God was giving me clues…No. 1 reason not to marry him! 

While he was in jail I began talking to my parents about him and what kind of family life he had (none…both parents were alcoholics and father was dead) I told my mom we were going to get married, so could he please come and stay at our house, he needed to get away from this home and try to make his life better by getting a job so we could get our own place when we married.  One condition they said, “he would have to stay out in the garage which we had enclosed.”  That was cool with me!  Eventually, we started living together under my parents roof!  How could I have ever done that to my parents?  I made that choice and my parents let me get away with it.  Reason No. 2 not to marry him!  God still trying to move in my life…I’m not listening!

During this time he would go to work, but not come home after work.  Why did I want to marry someone like this.  This was not my upbringing.  But, I had already had sex with him and was going to change him, this was the man I was suppose to marry, I thought.  We were together 2 years before we married, he treated me like *&%#!  Friends tried to tell me things that he had done but, I wouldn’t listen.  Reason No. 3 not to marry him! God still speaking!

Marriage Day, May 1980, big church wedding, many people on my side, few on his.  My dads pockets were emptied on this wedding.  We had no money for a honeymoon so my sister let us borrow her apartment!  Yeah, a borrowed apartment for a honeymoon!  The night of our marriage a couple gave us a big party.  On top of my pill popping my new husband put drugs in my drink!  I passed out to wake up and find him gone.  My friends told me he left with another girl!  What?  On our wedding night!  Yep, it happened, he slept with another woman on our wedding night!  Reason No. 4, God says this is not the husband I have chosen for you.

From 1980-1983 I was abused physically (battered), abused mentally and almost everyday someone else besides me was sleeping in my bed.  I was the only one holding down a job at this time.  His job was selling drugs.  In late 1982 my parents were visiting our home with my niece (Tina) when our home was surrounded by the Drug Enforcement Officer’s (he had sold to an under cover the night before).  They busted into our home with guns and began throwing everything around.  I begged them to let my niece and my mom leave, but ask my dad to stay, I was afraid.  They took my husband to jail after they had ram sacked our home.  My dad stayed with me, I told him I was so sorry and ask for his forgiveness.  As my father, he forgave me and tried to talk me into coming back home.  I looked at my dad and told him, “I made my bed, now I have to lye in it.”  Reason No. 5, God shows me this man was not intended to be my husband!  God is trying to move me in the right direction, but I’m not listening.  Look, God was giving me the out!  He had committed Adultery against me and I knew it!

He made bail (can’t remember who signed) and was out the next day and made a plea bargain with the drug enforcement to be a nark!  Yep, turned in his friends.  No jail time spent. 

After getting busted, we were ask to move by our landlords.  We moved into an apartment complex where one of my other sisters (Nancey) lived with her roommate, son, and baby daughter.  We had no food, and was living on welfare for our rent and utility bills, I barely made minimum wage and he did not work at all, he could get a job, but would work only long enough to get a little money then quit.  I kept Nancey’s daughter part-time also.  

In March 1983, it was my day to keep my niece (Beth) Nancey’s daughter, but her roommate wanted to keep her.  She was going to drop Nancey off at work and take her (my sister’s) car to get some work done on it.  Nancey called my dad that afternoon and said her roommate had not made it to pick her up so she needed a ride home because she couldn’t get in touch with her.  My dad drove to the Arsenal to get her.  When they returned home a police car was waiting in the drive at her apartment.  The officers ask them to get in the police car and ride to the Arsenal.  The officer told them there had been a wreck on the Arsenal involving her car.  I found out later that evening that Beth and my sister’s roommate had been killed in the accident.  My sisters roommate had not taken the car in to get it fixed, but had been drinking at a friends house all day!  She was drunk and hit another car head on.  Beth was 3 years old, all I could think about was that it was my day to watch her…if I had of kept her my sisters baby wouldn’t have died that day!  God was really trying to get my attention!

My father was still a new Christian at this time, but he knew God’s Word.  He held our family together through this huge loss and trial that we were all having to experience. 

After this I started attending church again, but I just couldn’t give up things in my life that God wanted me to give up…drugs, alcohol, and being abused by my husband.  How could I have loved him that deeply?

The sleeping around and abuse by my husband continued and we separated many times, and eventually divorced in October 1983.  I just couldn’t take it anymore!  I divorced him!  I felt worthless, had very low self-esteem, more introverted then I ever had been, afraid to even look at people, talking to people…no way, I was just plain battered.  Was I not low enough yet to listen to God???

Teen Life-Why Do We Want To Fit In? (My Life Part 2) November 13, 2008

If you haven’t read “My Life Part 1″ you can find it in my recent posts or archive.

Let me take you back just a sec for a better understanding of my raising!  I was not a bad child, I was afraid I would get into trouble if I did anything wrong, remember I was an introvert.  I was spoiled, after all I was 8 years younger than my sister and I was the baby.  As a child growing up I did what all kids do…test my parents.  My parents were good role models and had never been in trouble a day in their lives…not even a speeding ticket.  I never saw my mom or dad drunk, my dad may have had an occasional drink.  They had a great marriage and are working toward their 61st wedding Anniversary.

I need to explain to you why I didn’t fit in…in my early years.  I was born with “Dewayne Syndrome,” a muscle in my right eye was not long enough to align my eye straight in the center (my right eye stayed in the corner toward my nose) cross eyed, yep cross eyed!  Kids were mean and this is what I was called “Cross Eyed Lynn!” 

When I was very young I remember hiding behind my parents because of embarrassment, not wanting anyone to notice my eye!  My eye doctor was trying different things with my eye trying to stretch the muscle because surgery was risky (I didn’t know how risky the surgery was until I was about 40 years old).  At 12 years old my doctor decides to do surgery on my eye.  The surgery straightened it, but it can never be fixed perfectly.  I still see double when I turn my head a certain way, when I get tired my eye gets lazy, if I’m trying to focus on someone talking to me it will sometimes drift!  By the time I was 40 I was sure that technology had come for enough along that I could completely get the ole’ eye fixed…it’s very annoying when driving and you have to turn completely around in your seat or you will see two cars! LOL!  I saw a new optometrist, she took one look into my eye and told me if anyone ever told me they could fix the ole’ eye then I had better high tale it out of their office.  The surgeon that had performed my surgery had done an excellent job and that was all that could be done.  Her answer was ok for me, I had already gotten through the rough times in my life that I really worried about what people thought about my eye!  Not until I was in my late 20’s I could use my eye for laughs!  I can do something with my eye that others can’t do and we all get a kick out of it now!  I have family members trying to learn to make their eye do what mine can do! LOL! 

So back to my story!  So my eye is kind of fixed, but I still have the issues of being a very shy teen with a low self-esteem.  I spent my early teenage years 13-16 at the skating rink just like everybody else in the 70’s.  Laugh out Loud there was nothing else to do.  Ha! I’m old!!! During these few years I was turning into a heavy smoker and teen girl that used very profound language!  Still in church every Sunday, Sunday night and Wednesday night! Oh, smoking wasn’t so bad, most all my friends were doing it, even my church friends.  My friends and I would save our lunch money and take time about buying them.  That’s how cheap they were in the 70’s, I think $.35 – $.50 cents a pack.  We would walk right into the store and buy them…no ID required!  It is an encouragement to know that my child can not walk in the store today and buy them, but it doesn’t mean it will keep them from smoking, but it does make it a tad harder.  That is the choice that they have to make…right or wrong as they mature! I pray and hope that each of my children will make choices they won’t REGRET! 

Now don’t get me wrong, God was speaking to me all these years, I wanted to do what was right and be saved…but I was angry with God for the way He made me!  I would beg him to make me attractive, to take away the eye thing, to help me fit in with those popular people, to give me a brain that could understand what I read and retain it.  All I was doing was running from Him instead of stopping and listening and giving Him my life.  I want you to remember as you read about my life that God was with me through it all, I never saw it then…but I see it very well today!

Then…I turned 16 and received my drivers license!  What is it about turning 16 and just going crazy? I know…some teens do and some don’t, well I was the one that did.  I wanted to fit in so bad at that age I was going to try what ever I could to make that happen.  I wasn’t a leader, I was a follower…remember I was a very shy introverted child and teen! 

So where was I…Oh, yea 16 and license!  Guess where that took me??  With the license came the begging for the car on the weekends…me and one of my best friends began circling and hanging out at the boat harbor down at the Tennessee River…this was a hangout for everyone of driving age and older! I practically took over my moms car. How did that happen?? I was spoiled and I did throw some fits!  Fits at 16, me Nah!

We started out riding around on Friday and Saturday night with a normal teen curfew. We met many people as we would sit and watch the cars circle!  Everyone stopping and talking with each other, meeting many people much older than us, more experienced in many things than we were.  A place where a lot of drinking and smoking were going on.  So here it is, I began drinking at 16, it was there and it was offered and I took it, again starting out just to fit in.

One night as we were all sitting on the hood of my car (my moms)…here came a white 1960’s Jaguar…I’m talking cool car!  I don’t remember how in the world we got the guys that were in it to stop and talk to us, but they did.  My best friend and I ended up in the car with them…this car was so cool…the inside was decked out in wood that was very expensive and beautiful, it even had black lights in it…man it was ripped!  As we were riding around in this hot car, with some cool guys having fun, one of the guys took out a joint (marijuanna) and lit it, they all started passing it around…I had no idea of what to do, I had never seen that, I was afraid!  My friend and I wouldn’t have any part of it that night and the guys never pressured us to!  As time passed night after night hanging at the hot spot, meeting up with these guys, riding in a hot looking Jaquar, listening to loud music, and drinking…thinking this was great fun, this was our life with pretend church on the other side.  These guys never pressured us, just liked us for who we were.  We became good friends with them and of course you get the picture, we both eventually caved!!!  We decided to try it (pot)! The day we smoked our first joint was on a Sunday afternoon, we were always at the Sunday night service at our church and we walked in late.  Both of us walked in that service “high,” I will never forget it as long as I live!  It is as if I spit in the face of Jesus!  

Hangest thou in there, more to come (My Life Part 3)!