Bring on the New Year 2009 December 31, 2008

I am so ready for the New Year 2009, God has something special en-store for my family…I know it!  God is Blessing!  Last year beginning January 11, 2008 we stepped into a storm that actually blew our entire family away…it was so unexpected.  It not only affected my family, but, my extended family as well.   

Have you ever felt like your life has just been ripped right out from under you and there is no where to turn…church gone…friends gone, even friends that you actually thought were your best of  friends, just vanish.  This is what happened to our family…all our friends were in the church.  Cuz you sure don’t want to hangout with non-Christians…now isn’t that right??????  Talk about this more on into my blog!

We left our church toward the end of January, God leading us to worship in our home.  I did have 2 friends and my entire family and Pauls family that stuck to us like clue during this storm.  Although, our BIGGEST and BESTEST friend was JESUS.  Even though I so love those 2 friends and our family, He was the One we needed the most!

We began worship in our home as soon as we stopped attending our other church.  We got up every Sunday morning took our showers as if attending church as we normally would have.  My hubby put all the music together every week and we jammed for 30 minutes to our favorite worship songs.  Man how AWESOME this was, Jesus was rockin in our house with us.  We played the music as loud as we wanted, clapped, raised our hands and partied with the JESUS!  Amen!  After our worship time we watched a video relating to teen issues then following this we did a Kay Arthur 40 minute study lead by my hubby!  Zachary did song worship with us, then he would go and watch a Bible based video in his room.  On Wednesday nights Paul met with our teen boys and did Bible Studies with them while Liana and I did a Bible Study together maybe this could have been call our small group time.

Our family was growing closer and closer together.  Paul and the boys became close and Liana and I became mother/daughter friends.  God had us right where he wanted us in this season of our life.  Even though it was hard we tried our best to keep our eyes on God and be obedient in everything He wanted us to do.

We never missed a Sunday or Wednesday night for 6 months in our home.  God began moving in mine and Paul’s hearts…leading us both in the direction to begin searching for a church.  We begin to visit churches and praying that God would show us the right church.  We visited 2 churches and neither one of us nor the kids felt like God was leading us to either one.

I was searching online for churches in our area and came across Crosspoint Community Church which met in the movie theater behind the Mall in Decatur, AL.  I ask Paul to view their website and see what he thought about it.   I felt like from reading and listening to Pastor Dave sermons online…that this might be a place we could check out and the kids would like.

We had our first visit in June…(during this time Blake our oldest was in Basic Training at Fort Benning) we all thought it was awesome the first Sunday we were there.  We went back again the next Sunday, and the next…we were being drawn to this church.  I began to write Blake about the church while he was at Fort Benning…he was getting excited about it just through my letters.

Let me go back…the first time we visited Crosspoint, what stood out in my mind from the whole sermon was a comment that Pastor Dave made,  ”Crosspoint is a church that wants people that no other churches want,” man that got me fired up!  Pastor Daves sermon was awesome and the worship leader and band were worshiping exactly like we had been doing at home for the past 6 months.  Think that might have been God leading us?

Well guess what, we are still there and have not visited any other churches.  We are involved as volunteers for a portable church…which is the most awesome church I have ever been in or a part of.  Crosspoint is not there for the Christians, but for the lost.  Just as Jesus didn’t come for the religious but for the lost.  Mark 2:17  17 When Jesus heard this, he told them, “Healthy people don’t need a doctor—sick people do. I have come to call not those who think they are righteous, but those who know they are sinners.”  I’m not saying they don’t love the Christian body…but they need the christian body that comes there to get up off their butts and do Gods work.  Crosspoint wants to harvest the fields that are white to harvest of Morgan County, the City of Decatur and all surrounding cities and counties.  Crosspoint, the staff and volunteers are busy about this work and put their hearts into it.  Yes, it is hard work for them and many are up and at the theater setting up by 5:00 a.m. on Sunday morning then taking down after the service in time for the theatre to open. 

God is Blessing!  Crosspoint is doing 2 services now.  Paul and I have seen it double since we began attending.

Pastor Dave works a full-time job, his job has him traveling, but he never stops ministering to people!  He feeds and ministers to his sheep!  And is fired up about winning the lost to Christ and that is his Vision and his Vision for Crosspoint. 

As I look back on our trial of 2008, I see Jesus carrying my family because there is only one set of footprints.  I see him carrying us right into the doors of Crosspoint and giving us the opportunity to serve Him and be a part of a Vision I have never seen before.  Thank you God for leading and guiding us in this time of trial. 

Another thing I see as I look back over the years and that I have learned from our storm of 2008. is that I pretty much only had christian friends.  Since being at Crosspoint I have learned and have been challenged through the scripture and God speaking through Dave that it’s ok to hangout with or have lost friends.  That’s who Jesus wants! 

It’s ok for someone to come into Crosspointchurch with their houseshoes on.  It’s ok for someone to wear blue jeans on Sunday morning, it’s ok if someone comes into the service with 8 holes in each ear, it’s ok if someone comes in with tatoo’s on their body, it’s ok if a drunk comes in reaking of alcohol, it’s ok if a homosexual comes in, it’s ok if someone with marital problems or drug users come into our church (Crosspoint) on Sunday morning because that is who Crosspoint wants. 

How am I/you suppose to witness to somebody that doesn’t know me…are they going to listen?  Yes, I can be a witness by shuving the scripture down someones throat and MAYBE some would take me up on the offer and accept Christ as their Savior, then what…will they know what to do.  But, if I/you spend your time getting to know that lost person, showing that lost person how much I/you care, devoting our time, our prayers, helping that person out in ways that no one else could do…just maybe this person is going to get to know me/you and through me/you will come to know Christ.  What an investment of our time!  AWESOME!

So this is my taking on beginning the New Year 2009.  I am only going to make one New Years Resolution.   This is…to be OBEDIENT TO GOD IN… INVESTING MY TIME in getting to know HIM more… INVESTING MY TIME into getting to know lost people and WINNING them to CHRIST!  I need your prayers…I’m human, I guarantee you I will mess this up, but keep me lifted in your prayers that I will run the race that is set before me.

Hebrews 12:1-3  1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. 2 We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith.^[a] Because of the joy^[b] awaiting him, he endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now he is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne. 3 Think of all the hostility he endured from sinful people;^[c] then you won’t become weary and give up.

God Bless and Have a Happy and Blessed New Years 2009!

Can’t Get My Blog On…but I’ve Got My Mark On December 25, 2008

Sorry I haven’t blogged in a while…everything has been out of sorts for me this Christmas season!  I usually have all my gifts bought by Thanksgiving or right after!  I really screwed (sorry) messed that up this year!  I was shopping right up until Christmas Eve and still didn’t get stocking stuffers!  I know I am a terrible mom!  First year my kids has ever gone without stockings…they didn’t even get candy in the darn things.  It was if I was turning in circles.  My hubby did the shopping for our kids.  (All I had to do was buy for other family members and little odd and end stuff.)  On top of that my hubby wrapped all the presents. 

I don’t tell him enough how thankful I am for him, nor how much I love him.  God sent him to me for a reason…no one else can understand or would understand me.  I’m not saying my hubby does either but, he tolerates me!  He definitely has Galatians 5:22-23 in him.   22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23gentleness and self-control.  The funny part is, my hubby also thinks God gave me to him.  Isn’t that neat?  He saves me often from going off the deep end…sometimes I’m already in the deep murky stuff and he manages to pull me out, build my confidence, self-esteem and helps take away all those worries that I tend to have often…(yes, I know that is a sin).  When I talked about him being my hero…in my life story on this blog, on facebook and myspace…I mean’t it, he truly is.  When he took me as his wife, he mean’t every vow he said to me and he proves those to me daily.  I have never seen a man…not saying there is not one…but my hubby has always put his children before anything in this life besides Christ and myself.  Our family was built by him.  Even though our family has had life struggles and trials set before us, our faith in God and my hubby being the leader of our home  has helped us keep our eyes focused on Christ and not the situations we were in.  YES, it is definantly hard not to dwell on those difficult seasons in our life, but Jesus is our HOPE our Eternal HOPE.  This is the HOPE that we want others to know.  I can truly say there will never be another man in my life if my hubby goes to heaven before me.  I do have to admit that my hubby is…my hero #2.

My hero #1 is my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, for he died that I might be set free.

Romans 6:6-11   Could it be any clearer? Our old way of life was nailed to the cross with Christ, a decisive end to that sin-miserable life—no longer at sin’s every beck and call! What we believe is this: If we get included in Christ’s sin-conquering death, we also get included in his life-saving resurrection. We know that when Jesus was raised from the dead it was a signal of the end of death-as-the-end. Never again will death have the last word. When Jesus died, he took sin down with him, but alive he brings God down to us. From now on, think of it this way: Sin speaks a dead language that means nothing to you; God speaks your mother tongue, and you hang on every word. You are dead to sin and alive to God. That’s what Jesus did.

Now I know my blog started out pathetic, feeling sorry for myself.  But you know what?…my kids didn’t get as much this Christmas as they usually do and didn’t even whine about it…yes, everything was very hectic, but this has been a very happy and memorable Christmas for me and my family.  We have spent quality time with each other and have had church via internet at our home and celebrated Christ’s coming!  Now how can I leave this blog saying that I didn’t have a Wonderful Christmas! 

I really need to mention that I have many people who inspire me from my church, Crosspoint Community Church.  Our pastor, Dave Anderson , many friends on my twitter and facebook and the many friends on the right of my page that blog who keep me encouraged about church and the vision that our church has. 

Have you ever thought about being marked in Christ?  Our church just finished a series entitled ”INKED”, it definiately left a mark on our church and on me and my family.  Our pastor, did things in our church during this series that probably no other church in Alabama or anywhere close has ever done.  I’m quoting him, “We did it because it was THE VERY BEST WAY to communicate WHY Christ came to earth and show what our response should be.  When Christ came he left a permanent “mark” on this planet.  He left us here to continue that.”  Please follow this link to his blog and read “INKED” – IT MARKED US!  Also, read the INKED Stories that were told by some of my friends from Crosspoint.

I will leave you with CHRIST, MARKED, and to CONTINUE!

God Bless and Merry Christmas!

Christmas Blues….. December 9, 2008

Each year beginning before Thanksgiving, I begin to get hyped up about Christmas.  I think about decorating the outside and inside of my house, having it ready to reveal to the neighborhood on Thanksgiving night!  Every year it comes with great excitement.  This year it didn’t happen!  I mean give me a break I was only a couple of days off.

I truly love Christmas and the very meaning of it…Jesus.  But, every year I seem to get miserable around this time of year!  As I decorate I get more and more stressed as each ball goes on the tree, as each wreath goes on the window and as each strand of garland with lights and red bows are hung around my porch.  Grant it, I get it done.  I then feel like crap knowing it’s going to have to come down in a month! 

My Home for Christmas

Even seeing my home all lit up with spot lights, red bows, wreaths and lighted garland draped around my huge front porch, having 2 trees, one in the foyer, tall slim tree decorated in hot pinks, lime, purple and aqua blue. 

Foyer Tree

In the great room a Santa tree, of course decorated in Santa’s, all the kids stuff that was made at school, stuffed christmas animals and toys, big red and green balls and colored lights, a snow village with plenty of snow hanging from the mantle with stockings hanging from the fireplace insert, and my most favorite of all the manager scene, I still have the Christmas Blues.

Santa Tree

 

Snow Village

This year is even worse!  I have only bought 2 presents and I have 4 children.  Today is the 9th of December…I usually have my Christmas done by Thanksgiving or right after.  I tend to use online Christmas!  Can’t even do that this year, seeing that I have waited to late.  Does anyone have this problem?  Oh, I know I’m not the only one!

Stockings

Really…all I want for Christmas is to celebrate Jesus the Most High, Everlasting, Prince of Peace!

I would like to be relaxed and enjoy my family, some gift giving and some wonderful Christmas music with some eggnog!  That’s all I want for Christmas!

Manager Scene

Here is how I usually look at it, I feel like going into hibernation mode. I just want to curl up and sleep right thru the holidays.  I think I have seasonal affective disorder, ever what that is??  What’s even more difficult is trying to stay upbeat for my family and not bring them down, although I do tend to make them miserable while I’m putting all the decorations up.   They want to help and I’m rearranging everything they put up…not good!  As I am sitting here writing, the wind is blowing so hard, I hear decorations falling and hitting my porch!  Why is it everytime the decorations go up the wind begins to blow?   Happens every year!

While others, especially my children are counting the days until Christmas, I am counting the days until Christmas is over!  They should make a pill you can take to get rid of the Christmas blues!  I’m going to try my very best to get rid of my Christmas Blues starting now…relax and have a thankful Christmas.

Maybe I should start by saying what I’m thankful for:

1. Christ died for me that I may have eternal life with Him.
2. He changed my life when I accepted Him as my Savior.
3. God gave me a Christian Mom and Dad.
4. God gave me a very special husband that IS my hero, friend and the love of my life.
5. God gave me 4 beautiful and wonderful precious children.
6. God provided a way for me to stay home and raise my children.
7. God gave me a Pastor and Church Crosspoint Community Church that meets the needs of my family, I/we are blessed to be apart of the vision of Crosspoint…that is winning unsaved people to the Lord…Crosspoint is very serious about this vision.
8. God gave me my wonderful sisters.
9. God gave me my beautiful neices and nehews.
10. God gave me a special Mother and Father inlaw.
11. God gave me a beautiful home to live in.
12. I am thankful for the friends that have received me and my family at Crosspoint.

Well, I feel better, there is so many other things that I am thankful for and could have written, but this is a start and I will finish my list.  When God is in the picture their is no reason to feel so blue. we may be struggling with trials in our life and sometimes it’s not easy to face these trials, but who better to go through them with than our Lord Jesus Christ!  I pray that God will help me to focus on that which He has done for me and given me and take all the Christmas Blues out of my home.  How about yours?  Maybe you should make a list!

I will be praying for all you other Christmas Blues people.  I pray that each and everyone of you will, love Jesus, celebrate Jesus, love your family, relax, give your gifts and have a joyful time listening to some great Christmas music, drinking hot chocolate and eggnog!

Joy to the world, the LORD is coming!

Battered to Better…With Christ In My Life! (“My Life” Part 4) December 3, 2008

Just a little recap…alcohol, drugs (no needles) at age 16, sex at 18, and married into a marriage of adultery and abuse (physically and mentally) at age 20.

Here I am a 23 years old, a divorcee weighing in at 90 lbs. from lack of food and depression.  I had no job, lost at the time my ex-husband was arrested for selling drugs.  I didn’t want a job, was afraid of people, had low self-esteem, felt worthless, I was so fragile I mostly just wanting to die, but was afraid to.  Being raised in church, I KNEW I would go to hell. 

Being raised in a Christian home, I knew what Jesus did for me, I wanted to do what was right, I wanted a marriage with Christ and the church in it.  I had convictions when I did all these bad things in my life, but I had problems and I was screwed up.  Satan had me and I was not willing to change.  I believe I was definitely running from God.

After the divorce I could have gone back home to my parents, but chose not to, my life was a mess.  One of my sister’s offered her home, I would be able to stay with her until I could get on my feet.  I would go on interview after interview, it terrified me to interview with anyone especially a man.  I thought…who would hire someone that looked like me, and one that was so introverted as I was, no one!  I would cry myself to sleep at night and pray for God to get me out of this mess.  You know how you pray (I know you all know what I’m talking about) and ask God to do things for you?  The only time you call on Him is in your own time of need.  That is exactly what I was doing, feeling sorry for myself begging God to fix it, but not wanting to turn over anything to Him. 

In 1984 my oldest sisters friend got me a job at Mid-South Machinery in Athens, AL (Commercial John Deere Dealer, you know those BIG yellow ones) as a receptionist.  Oh my gosh, that was crazy, I was afraid to answer the phone (seriously).  Then they expected me to use a CB radio to talk to our mechanics that were in the field working on the the heavy equipment.  Not me, no way!  As days went on I begin to feel more comfortable with my job and the people I worked with.  I was promoted within 3 months of being there!  I began to help in the parts department.  Little 90 lb. me handling dozer parts!  Then I was sent to open a store in Tuscumbia, AL…good grief, I really did that!  I was getting more and more confident in myself.  After being there for 6 months I was promoted to Office Manager working directly for the Sales Manager.

Making more money, meant back into drugs and drinking.  I was making enough money to move out of my sisters and move in with a friend I went to school with.  Eventually our apartment became known as the “Animal House!”  People all over Decatur new of our parties even people in jail, because many people would get caught leaving our apartment.  It was nothing for my roommate and I to drink a 5th of Tequila and half case to a case of beer every night…party after party after party.  The police visited our apartment frequently, because of loud parties. 

I loved my job and made sure I was able to work everyday.  So now I’m in a completely different world from being married…I was loving it!  I was happy with my job and all the new friends I was making.  I was coming out of my shell, that I had been beaten in for 5 years total.

Let me switch gears now.  Sharing this is very hard and shameful for me, but I need to tell it to the ones that are reading my blog with similar problems.   Here goes…after getting a little confidence built up in me, having big parties every night, meeting new people, having new friends.  I decided I would treat guys like I had been treated in the past.  As the saying goes “love’m and leave’m!”  I did exactly that.  

Since being saved, I have told my story to youth groups and they would gasp as I would say, “I have been with more men than I can count on both of my hands!”  I couldn’t even tell you some of those mens names because of being messed up and drunk.  Then I would follow with this, “Sex is a good thing”,

Genesis 2: 24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.

Hebrews 13:4 Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.

We all are going to be tempted with sex this is Gods way out:

1 Corthians 10:13 No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

“God says we shouldn’t have sex out of marriage, I want you to think about it like this,” “a piece of everyone of those men was stuck to me, when you have sex (the man and woman) become as “one” in Gods eyes.” 

1 Corithians 6:16 Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, “The two will become one flesh.”

You can be forgiven and can be washed as white as snow, just like me!

Isaiah 1:18 ”Come now, let us reason together,”
       says the LORD.
       “Though your sins are like scarlet,
       they shall be as white as snow;
       though they are red as crimson,
       they shall be like wool.

At the end of 1984 I began a new job at Delta Research, Inc., Huntsville, AL.  This was an engineering firm…contractor for the government (Missile Defense).  I started as a receptionist.  This is where I met Paul who became my best friend.  We would hang out at bars after work and drink, I was still smoking marijuanna, Paul didn’t, matter of fact none of the ones that I hung out at work with smoked it. 

Eventually I was promoted to a technical typist and had to have a securtiy clearance so I came clean of drugs, I needed to keep this job, it was the best opprotunity I had ever had.  The Defense Investigative Service came back to me after there investigation of me and told me everything that I had done from my first husband on!  Unbelievable huh!  I had never been arrested, how could they know!  I told them that I still drank but did not do any drugs anymore.  I had several conferences with them and they finally gave me my security clearance. 

I promoted to Security Manager (over classified documents) in 1985 and then in 1989 I became Office Manager.  Paul and I had been friends during this time and would do things together with a group.  In June 1988 he ask me out and our relationship went from a friendship of 4 years to falling in love.  You couldn’t seperate us from each other at that point.  The thing about our relationship was we new about one anothers dirt!  When we started dating we began talking about what we wanted in a family.  We both wanted to raise our children in church although he was a little skeptic because of the experience he had as a teen in the church.  Within a couple of months I had moved in with Paul (Madison, AL) and then on February 24, 1989 we were married.

One of the ladies that worked with us would call me into her office often and witness to me.  I would sit and listen to her, I really wanted what she had.  She was planting a seed.  I got to where I would go to her office and talk to her and would cry but never make a commitment.

I found out I was pregnant in November 1989.  I quit drinking and smoking cigarettes with the wonderful news and was ready to become a mother.  Although I did have the most miserable pregnancy anyone could ever have, I think.  I was trying to go back to college for a Computer Science degree and just couldn’t handle it being pregnant.  I worked at Delta up until my 8th month of pregnancy.  I had Blake August 21, 1990.  By the time Blake was 4 weeks old he was a very sick baby.  We were in and out of hospitals, doctors running test…finding nothing.  Paul and I decided that it would be best that I stay at home with Blake so I quit my job at Delta in 1991.  I will talk about this trial with Blake later in another post.  

We moved from Madison to Somerville in 1991 so that I could be close to my parents.  I was so ready to settle down and have a family that went to church together and able to raise their children in church.  I began visiting a church in Priceville in January 1991.  The pastor at this church was my pastor at the church I grew up in during my teen years.  My parents were very close friends with he and his wife so they knew all about what had happened in my life all those years.

I began attending worship services regularly, Sunday morning, Sunday night and Wednesday night.  Blake was just about 5 months old and attended with me on Sunday mornings.  Paul still didn’t attend, very involved in his work and wanted his time off spent with his son.

In March 1991 I was saved by Gods grace.  It changed my life, of course it didn’t fix the stuff in my life that was screwed up or twisted at that very moment, but God started changing me!  It has been a long haul I am a picture of Old Testament Israel…so disobedient and stupid.

The pastor made a visit to Paul and said something that stuck in his mind and made him think about coming to church.  That quote was “there will always be hipocrites in the church, but it is better than the alternative.”  So in 1991 our family began our life together with Christ and the church.

I had to go through some rough stuff before I would let God take control of my life.  God has brought me a long way I can see Him in it every step of it.  He picked me up and carried me many times in my 1st marriage and is still carrying me now.  God is still working on me, “I’m under construction,” and will be under construction until He takes me to be with Him.

There is so much more I could share about what I have done and where I have been in my life, but I just wanted to touch on some pieces of it.  I hope that in reading this, if you are in an abusive relationship you seek help in Gods word and others.  If you think God could never forgive you for what you have done, look back at my life one more time and see where I was and what He has done for me.  I am thankful that I gave my life to Him, I now have that loving husband, that loves God and 4 beautiful children that are letting God lead their lives also.  We all attend Crosspoint Community Church and are serving as God leads us and are very fortunate to be in a church that has a vision like Crosspoint.

Family Tradition…But What I’m Thankful For! November 29, 2008

I am so thankful for what God has brought me through.  If you have been following my post on “My Life” which is not complete, you can see where I have been in my life thus far.  I made wrong choices as a young teen, but God used my circumstances to mold me into what I am today.  He continues to mold me like the potter does his pottery or the silversmith refining his silver.  The fire may get hot, and by all means I’m not rejoicing…but, I look back and see how I have grown from the Potters or Refiner’s Hands!  He is not through with me yet!

I went through a time in my life where I had no food or very little (I didn’t go in detail about this in my post on “My Life”).  I am so grateful that I spent that time knowing what it feels like to have no food or very little, no washer to wash clothes or money to take them to the laundry mat, only a tub (bathtub for scrubbing them), no car to go places or a junk of a car with no money to put gas in.

God had a plan for me even after I had made those choices. God is using me now as a servant to others and I am so grateful for that.  I love helping people, it is my passion.

Our Life Group from Crosspoint Community Church  had the opportunity to help with a couple and their 2 granddaughters for Thanksgiving, she was such a blessing to our group!  This is things of which I am so thankful for.  Being blessed more by the ones you are helping, this is what I love.

I am thankful for Christ dying for me and the entire world that we may have eternal life with Him.  I am thankful for my mom who raised me in church so that when I strayed like the prodical son, I knew to come home.  I am thankful for my husband Paul, my friend, the love of my life and my hero.  Without him I would have not had values in my life.  He has taught me so much throughout our 19 almost 20 years of marriage about family, caring loving and respecting one another, I am so thankful that God put him in my life.

I am thankful for the church that I attend now (Crosspoint), it is a church that has a vision to reach the lost (the unsaved) and I feel blessed to be apart of that vision.  I love God, my Husband, my family, my church and am thankful that I have these in my life.  My God has blessed me more than I could ever deserve.

Psalms 100:3

3 Know that the LORD is God.
       It is he who made us, and we are his ;
       we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.

Psalm 95

 1 Come, let us sing for joy to the LORD;
       let us shout aloud to the Rock of our salvation.

 2 Let us come before him with thanksgiving
       and extol him with music and song.

 3 For the LORD is the great God,
       the great King above all gods.

 4 In his hand are the depths of the earth,
       and the mountain peaks belong to him.

 5 The sea is his, for he made it,
       and his hands formed the dry land.

 6 Come, let us bow down in worship,
       let us kneel before the LORD our Maker;

Psalm 107:1
“Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever.”

Growing Even Further Away From God and Church (My Life Part 3) November 17, 2008

Between the ages of 16-18 years I was partying heavily.  I began hanging at a house in Decatur that was known as “The Party House of Decatur!”  I made many friends at this house, why?, there was no judgement between anyone, you were accepted the way you were.  Come on in the more the merrier.

Still very introverted the drugs and drinking that I was doing helped me be a little more outgoing.  So by age 18, I was doing pot, pills (uppers, downers) some cocaine, drinking, and playing poker for money, I guess you can say the only thing I hadn’t done was had sex!

The police knew all about this house and it’s owner.  It was raided several times when I was there.  Did that scare me away from being apart of all this?? No! I look back and wonder why God didn’t take me out.  I can see how God had his hand on me and how he was guiding me even in my rebellious stage!

I eventually got up the courage to tell my mom that I wasn’t going to attend church anymore, that I had nothing in common with all those that were attending and most of them didn’t care about church either.  So I stopped going!!!

Then…I met a guy at the party house one night, he was 4 years older than me and very nice looking.  We began dating, if that is what you want to call it.  He began living at the party house, I was there night and day, so this was our date nights.  He never came to my home to meet my mother or father, I knew my parents wouldn’t approve, but I did talk to them about him, I made him sound good.

I was still a virgin at 18, then the inevitable happened.  We had been dating several months, he would tell me he loved me, he was going to marry me, so it would be ok.  I was so naive and wanting someone to care for me that I let it happen.  Soon after we started dating, a warrant for his arrest was issued to him (jail time for writing bad checks) I had no clue this was what he was doing!  He was in Morgan County Jail for about 3 months.  I attended the jail every Sunday to see him. I look back and I know God was giving me clues…No. 1 reason not to marry him! 

While he was in jail I began talking to my parents about him and what kind of family life he had (none…both parents were alcoholics and father was dead) I told my mom we were going to get married, so could he please come and stay at our house, he needed to get away from this home and try to make his life better by getting a job so we could get our own place when we married.  One condition they said, “he would have to stay out in the garage which we had enclosed.”  That was cool with me!  Eventually, we started living together under my parents roof!  How could I have ever done that to my parents?  I made that choice and my parents let me get away with it.  Reason No. 2 not to marry him!  God still trying to move in my life…I’m not listening!

During this time he would go to work, but not come home after work.  Why did I want to marry someone like this.  This was not my upbringing.  But, I had already had sex with him and was going to change him, this was the man I was suppose to marry, I thought.  We were together 2 years before we married, he treated me like *&%#!  Friends tried to tell me things that he had done but, I wouldn’t listen.  Reason No. 3 not to marry him! God still speaking!

Marriage Day, May 1980, big church wedding, many people on my side, few on his.  My dads pockets were emptied on this wedding.  We had no money for a honeymoon so my sister let us borrow her apartment!  Yeah, a borrowed apartment for a honeymoon!  The night of our marriage a couple gave us a big party.  On top of my pill popping my new husband put drugs in my drink!  I passed out to wake up and find him gone.  My friends told me he left with another girl!  What?  On our wedding night!  Yep, it happened, he slept with another woman on our wedding night!  Reason No. 4, God says this is not the husband I have chosen for you.

From 1980-1983 I was abused physically (battered), abused mentally and almost everyday someone else besides me was sleeping in my bed.  I was the only one holding down a job at this time.  His job was selling drugs.  In late 1982 my parents were visiting our home with my niece (Tina) when our home was surrounded by the Drug Enforcement Officer’s (he had sold to an under cover the night before).  They busted into our home with guns and began throwing everything around.  I begged them to let my niece and my mom leave, but ask my dad to stay, I was afraid.  They took my husband to jail after they had ram sacked our home.  My dad stayed with me, I told him I was so sorry and ask for his forgiveness.  As my father, he forgave me and tried to talk me into coming back home.  I looked at my dad and told him, “I made my bed, now I have to lye in it.”  Reason No. 5, God shows me this man was not intended to be my husband!  God is trying to move me in the right direction, but I’m not listening.  Look, God was giving me the out!  He had committed Adultery against me and I knew it!

He made bail (can’t remember who signed) and was out the next day and made a plea bargain with the drug enforcement to be a nark!  Yep, turned in his friends.  No jail time spent. 

After getting busted, we were ask to move by our landlords.  We moved into an apartment complex where one of my other sisters (Nancey) lived with her roommate, son, and baby daughter.  We had no food, and was living on welfare for our rent and utility bills, I barely made minimum wage and he did not work at all, he could get a job, but would work only long enough to get a little money then quit.  I kept Nancey’s daughter part-time also.  

In March 1983, it was my day to keep my niece (Beth) Nancey’s daughter, but her roommate wanted to keep her.  She was going to drop Nancey off at work and take her (my sister’s) car to get some work done on it.  Nancey called my dad that afternoon and said her roommate had not made it to pick her up so she needed a ride home because she couldn’t get in touch with her.  My dad drove to the Arsenal to get her.  When they returned home a police car was waiting in the drive at her apartment.  The officers ask them to get in the police car and ride to the Arsenal.  The officer told them there had been a wreck on the Arsenal involving her car.  I found out later that evening that Beth and my sister’s roommate had been killed in the accident.  My sisters roommate had not taken the car in to get it fixed, but had been drinking at a friends house all day!  She was drunk and hit another car head on.  Beth was 3 years old, all I could think about was that it was my day to watch her…if I had of kept her my sisters baby wouldn’t have died that day!  God was really trying to get my attention!

My father was still a new Christian at this time, but he knew God’s Word.  He held our family together through this huge loss and trial that we were all having to experience. 

After this I started attending church again, but I just couldn’t give up things in my life that God wanted me to give up…drugs, alcohol, and being abused by my husband.  How could I have loved him that deeply?

The sleeping around and abuse by my husband continued and we separated many times, and eventually divorced in October 1983.  I just couldn’t take it anymore!  I divorced him!  I felt worthless, had very low self-esteem, more introverted then I ever had been, afraid to even look at people, talking to people…no way, I was just plain battered.  Was I not low enough yet to listen to God???

Got To Top Of One Mountain, Spiraling Down Another! November 10, 2008

Our family has been dealing with a trial since January of 2007.  We were obedient to God in this situation, as we sought His face for answers.  We left our home church and spent almost 6 months in our own home having church because that is where God lead us.

People that we loved and were our friends has been very hurtful to my family and are raising their demonic heads again! You know what really just gets me…these people are Christians and were our best friends.

My post on my life may slow down a bit for I need to be in Gods Word more and more and seek His face in obedience to Him!  I need to drink the kool-aide of Jesus!  Be in prayer for our family as we deal with this trial and pray that we are obedient to God and not lash out like our flesh wants to do but that we will act like Jesus would have us to do as Christians!

Thank you for your prayers in advance!  I love my church Crosspoint Community Church in Decatur, AL and I know that our family will make it through with the church we attend now, because they are an encourgement to our family!

Thank you Dave for being the Pastor that you are!  You have a servants heart!

Love All!

My Life! (Part 1) November 8, 2008

This is going to take several post!  This will be the testimony of my life…becoming a Christian.  I thought now that the election is over I might give you an in-site into my life.  It is not a glamorous one for sure.

Let me start out by telling you I was born and raised in Decatur, AL.  I have a loving family and I was a daddy’s girl.  The family never had much money but the needs were met.  We have always been a very close family.  So close it is hard to go without talking to each other everyday! 

Now about me!  I was a very shy child with a learning disability that was overlooked by my parents (my parents were up in age when they had me and I had 3 older sisters me being 8 years younger than the 3rd sister) I was also overlooked by the school system.  Back in the day…to get help you had to be considered mental retarded.  So, in the eyes of my teachers I just didn’t study well enough to keep my grades up.  I had short term memory loss, although I could read well, and spell well, but never could remember what I read and never had a high level of intelligence because of vocabulary skills.  I wasn’t able to retain stuff.  I faked my way through my teenage life and most of my adult life trying to make people think I understood what they were talking about. 

I was able to have great jobs, was an Office Manager for Mid-South Machinery John Deere in Athens, AL and even started a new store in Tuscumbia, AL for John Deere.  I also worked for Delta Research as Security Manager (security of classified documents), and then became Office Manager, working with some of the smartest people (engineers) that I had ever been around.  How did that happen??  My office was in between the 2 owners of the company and I had to work for them and to keep things running in the office with 4 technical secretary’s under me!  I was good at hands on learning!  I probably made more money in 1990 than anyone with “no” college degree!  I will explain more about my work at Delta Research later down the road!

Even now for me to remember or to learn something I really have to dig deep and read things over and over…how frustrating.  My vocabulary is still very simple as some of you know.  No big words for me…not scared to ask what you mean!  I guess I get through it by calling myself “red,” whatever works.  I sometimes can’t think of words I would like to use in a sentence to carry on a conversation which is very frustrating.  Sooo, enough about this subject you get the picture!

So let’s switch gears, at a very young age I can remember my mom taking me to church.  I know she took me as a baby, but have memories of church when I was around 4 years of age.  My mom became a Christian at a young age and my father became a Christian at the age of 55 and he is now 84 years of age.  My mom went to church about 30 years without my dad and took my sisters and I Sunday after Sunday.

During my early church years I participated in all church activities from Preschool through Youth!  Not ever realizing what to do to accept Christ.  Was it just that easy, to ask Jesus into my heart?  I didn’t understand.  I never really understood how that could be, even though I had been in church for many years.  At the age of 16 I walked the church isle, because several friends of mine were making committments to follow Christ.  Was I really saved?  Were they really saved?  I don’t think I was, but I could see a change in some of my friends life and really wondered why my life wasn’t changing.  I wanted to be saved but I didn’t want to change some of my behaviors, being uneducated and trying to fit in somewhere was very hard for me!  So I chose people who didn’t care how smart you were, or how you looked, I just wanted to fit in.  This took me down a path of destruction!

I will start on My Life! (Part 2) tomorrow!  Hang in there and keep up and you can see how Christ made a difference in my life!

The DAY 2008! November 4, 2008

I woke this morning with a thrill of excitement…Election Day! I was a Proud American ready to do her duty at the polls! Our family has been praying for this election for a long time! This is an historical one that my youngest son Zach will probably see in his History book! Not for it being the most chaotic, mud slinging, and no good choice election, but for our Country finally allowing an African American Presidential candidate and a woman Vice Presidential candidate. I am proud of my country for this…it’s time to stop the racism of any kind. I pray that Gods will be done in this election, and pray that we all have interceded on behalf of this Great Country!

I was just going to talk about voting today but my daughter changed my mind! I’m going out on a limb here, but this is what is in my heart!

I have to tell you a about my 13 year old daughter, Liana. She has taken this election to heart! When she got up and dressed this morning, she came to me and said, “Mom I am literally sick of how this election may turn out!” This child’s stomach was in knots! We have talked to our kids about our political views and why we have them. Yes, we are conservatives! We have always taught our kids biblical principals…based on the rule book “The BIBLE” and the Ten Commandments…you get the picture. So with all that said…you have to know Liana. She is a very strong willed teen and she doesn’t mind telling you how she feels about what is right and what is wrong. She sees this very liberal candidate that doesn’t have values like what we have instilled in her. She just can’t fathom why all these people are voting for this candidate. He may be a good man, a good father, a good spouse, but his beliefs do not line up with the Word of God and she knows that! I hate that my child is worrying over an election and I told her that when it comes down to it if the other candidate is chosen we will pray and intercede on his behalf. I needed to add this little piece of information in…for never did I think about an election when I was 13 years of age.

Our children are suffering because of this GREAT Country turning against God. We as Christians are afraid to speak out! Sorry…if you didn’t like the sound of that, but this is my belief and my blog. I don’t have to be a theologian to know the world is going to hell in a hand basket and the Bible is being fulfilled!

I like Kay Authors quote, “Our country has changed—now, are we headed for revival or judgment?” I am hoping revival. It is time for all Christian Americans to raise the battle cry and take our nation back! How do we expect to change lives if we are afraid of speaking out as Jesus did during His time on earth. He told it like it was, no sugar coating, he got angry with the money changers in the temple and drove them out! Yes, He is loving, but yet He is God and weather you want to believe it or not God is a God of love and destruction. Can you believe that on several occasions He wanted to destroy the Israelites? Check out Exodus 32 and Numbers 11, Moses intercedes for the Israelites and God does not destroy them. When the Israelites are obedient to Him, God destroys their enemies!

So…now we know why we are faced with the problems of today! Rebelling against God! Christians not standing on the truth! Letting the evil of this world take over! Yes, I know God is in control, and the Bible is being fulfilled, but do you think God wants us to sit around twiddling our thumbs and not stand up for what He has written to us in His Word. The agnostics and atheist do a good job of standing up for what they believe in! So go figure!

These are solely my views and I know that many of you have your own that are completely different from mine, and I do respect them! The U.S wouldn’t be called a free Country if we could not voice our opinion.

I will be watching the election tonight with my family and when the time comes for one of the candidate to concede and the other make his victory speech…I promise that I will be obedient to God and pray for the leader Democrat or Republican of this GREAT Country!

God Bless All and God Bless America!